Pity Delaware

I remember the gold old days when a U-Haul truck had pictures on the side for each state of the union and the picture helped identify that state. For example, the New York truck would have the Statue of Liberty and the Kentucky truck has some blue grass singers. It’s been years since I’ve seen a more simple U-Haul truck. I even drive past a U-Haul rental place often and haven’t seen one in a while. Instead, they have pictures like this:

Now, for one, I do not associate the tiny state of Delaware as having big vacuum cleaner fish, nor do I really sleep well at night knowing that some poor guy’s stuff is being guarded by one. What gives? Is this some kind of weird campaign to teach people about the cool world around us? An attempt to get people to be more fascinated and care about the nature and all the things that are in it? Why not put up a picture for what Delaware is really known for? Wait, what is Delaware known for? Besides being the first state that is…

Wow, even Kansas has sunflowers. Poor Delaware, okay, maybe they can have a vacuum cleaner fish. Barooooommmmm!!!

Going Green?

There is something very wrong about a magazine doing a special issue on how important it is to save the environment. Just think, how many trees did they kill just to make the many copies of the issue?

Change is Good

Sometimes in life, you have to make big decisions. In reality, they are the same size as any other decision; they just seem bigger because you know ahead of time how much the outcome will change you.

No reason to worry. In less time than you think, you'll adapt and feel right at home again. Go for it.

Notecard with Pink Ribbon

I think that sometimes people suffer from information overload, especially when it comes to forming some kind of an identity. There are the messages you get from your family, home base or tribe. I would imagine that would be the first information one gathers in life. Then there is the public education system, peers and classmates as well as images we see from the mass media whether it would be on television, the internet, movies or those pesky magazines at the check out stand.

It’s a bit overwhelming; it’s amazing that there are even a few of us that come out sane in adulthood after being exposed to years of that. It also doesn’t help how much of a conflict results from growing up in such a culture. I live a thousand miles away from home, and yet, if my home tribe were where to tell me they were adamantly against something I was doing, I would probably change course to some degree, if not stop entirely, just because of their say so. I’ve come to accept the part of myself that is rooted in their belief system. I like to think I’ve just kept the good parts, the parts that work best for me.

I think that sometimes people just allow themselves to get overwhelmed. Yes, it’s stressful, but in a way, isn’t that the price we pay for this kind of freedom? There are definitely times in my life where I just wished a letter would show up at my house with instructions on what to do with my life. A step by step plan, tailored just for me, to be the happiest and most content I could be with myself and my life. Sadly, there are no such things, which is good, because with each new day comes with new information. I can adjust and grow as my life calls for it.

Is Adultness Upon Me

Throughout my young adult life I had to come to terms with the discrepancy that existed between who I thought I would become and who I actually was becoming. In lots of ways I wanted to think I somehow went through life with opened mindedness and good heartedness. That I was a good person and in many a fashion had hardly did no wrong. I wouldn’t necessarily call myself arrogant, just ridiculously optimist.

I’ve learned now, that regardless of whom you are and who you say you are, everyone does in fact have a belief system. Some people line their belief system up nicely with an established religious group or look to their family’s heritage to define it. I find it odd that there are people who fight this. Every atheist I have ever met does indeed have a belief system. It may not involve something called a god, but they do have a way to explain the world around them so that they go through life with some kind of peace and clarity.

I have really struggled the last few years. People always seemed egger to provide advice on to how I should view something. On one hand, it was very flattering. I know that some of those people have a great deal of difficulty share such things and it was brave of them to share them with me. However, on the other hand, such actions resulted in little patience for me. I needed to try things out, live life for a few days with a belief concept and see if it suited me.

I’m finding out that while I’m not as good hearted and opened minded as my five year old self would have liked for me to become, I like to believe that more good comes from than bad. I can make peace with that and feel I have. Granted, sometimes in order to do so, I must end my day with a mug of hot tea.

New Hampshire Beach Drive

Saturday we drove down the New Hampshire coast and checked out the area. Between the high tide and strong winds, there were no beaches. Along the main drag, Ocean Avenue, there is a nice “attractive” concrete wall that lines the road between the homes and the angry ocean beyond it. Despite the rain, we stopped on more than one occasional and I was in complete awe of its power. I completely understand now why people feel trapped living in the Midwest or the Rockies after living near something like this. Its power, it’s never ending strength. The sound of the rain was nothing compared to the sound of these forceful waves.

You look back, inland, and see all of the man made structures. Each one of them seems trivial and ugly compared to the ocean. I could not help but feel small next to her. That vast body of water has outlived everything we know or have come to know. I can remember when I was a lot younger and realizing that I drink the same water that dinosaurs have and feeling a strong sense of connection to our global community’s past, but after seeing the awesome power of an angry high tide, I’m beginning to feel it even more strongly in the current here and now. It’s very, very alive.

I keep thinking when I move to Hawaii in about a year that I will feel miserable and trapped but now I’m beginning to see that it is really not the case. My small self may be confined to the small land mass that makes up the Hawaii islands, but I’ll be anything but trapped. I may get bored. The ocean may go from being new and exciting to being very old, but spiritually, I will not be trapped.